Risk and Cost

Risk and Cost

    Risking it all for Jesus… I’ve heard this phrase tossed around in Christian circles. It sounds exciting. Bold. Holy. The problem is that it’s simply not true. I would even say it might be dangerous. “Risking it all” makes it sound like some of us are the spiritual high rollers, while everybody else is playing it safe in Heaven’s casino. You know, we give up our comforts and possessions to serve Jesus and someday earn a great big eternal crown. Some of us even leave our homes and everything we know to move to the other side of the world in a grand leap of faith. And people admire us, and our pictures hang on their church bulletin boards, and we sometimes make it into their pastors’ sermons. But eventually all of that praise falls flat. It doesn’t feel so...

Read More

An Open Letter to the Almost-There Missionary

An Open Letter to the Almost-There Missionary

 Dear friend, You sat on my couch the other day and said it’s too much. You said it with red eyes and deep breaths, and the others of us in the room breathed deep and teared up, too. Because we know. You and I, my friend, we’re in the same boat. We’re living in the in-between, not quite sure where we fit. Not completely here, but not all there yet. We’ve cut loose the moorings, and we’re on open ocean, going, going, but the going isn’t easy. The waves aren’t gentle, and they don’t seem to notice how much we’ve left behind. I want to tell you that it’s going to be ok, that if you give yourself enough time, your heart will feel whole again. But I can’t, and it won’t – at least not on this side of eternity, I think. When home is on both sides of the world, when you...

Read More

Even the Change

Even the Change

   It’s November. The leaves have changed, and so have our four walls. Our renters are moving into our house as I write this, and we sit snug and warm in the little apartment that will be our home until we move to Papua New Guinea in two months. Life looks different than it did a year ago. Really, really different. Unsettled, uncertain, moving forward faster than I can keep up. Some days it feels like more than I can handle. But for now, I’m snuggled peaceful under a blanket of gratitude, counting gifts breath by slow, deep breath. Girls, still sticky with this morning’s maple syrup, sitting quiet together and watching cartoons. The sound of a cold rain that wants to be snow. The strong and gentle arms of a man who is not afraid of hard work. Good food made by...

Read More